Happy New Year! - A look back on 2010

Tonight, in an hour, the UK will pass from 2010 to 2011. Almost half the world is already there, in fact! I hope 2010 has treated you well, and even if it hasn't, I hope 2011 will be (even) better. :) Here's a quick re-cap of the year of The Squeee.

The Squeee in 2010 - A year of unabashed fangirling

January opened with the All About the Brontës Challenge, where I set to work straight away, listening to some old radio plays of Jane Eyre, watched the 1996 film adaptation of the same and finished reading Wuthering Heights for the very first time. I also wrote about my visit to Haddon Hall the year before, and had ideas on how you might be able to make sports interesting, because let's face it, it's not exactly all that interesting. I also discovered I was Marianne Dashwood, even though I don't really play the piano.

February announced the first International Magic Day, the blog got itself a makeover, and we were being spoiled rotten by Mr. Armitage narrating even more ads! We took a trip to Blockbusters, resulting in a couple of film reviews, and the Brontë Challenge brought me The Professor - a book half in a language I don't understand very much of at all - and there was also a funny little book about mid-1800s etiquette that was rather amusing.

Jane Eyre '11 - release dates - not good news

BrontëBlog are reporting some very much awaited release dates for Jane Eyre 2011. Here's me thinking merrily that it'll have a release 11 March, or at least thereabouts. Wrong!

In chronological order:

11 March 2011 - USA (limited)
7 April 2011 - Australia
14 April 2011 - Germany
9 June 2011 - The Netherlands
9 September 2011 - UK
23 September 2011 - Spain
September 2011 - Denmark

Postilla by Tage Danielsson (1965)

Book review: Postilla by Tage Danielsson (1965), from Tage Danielssons Paket (Wahlström & Widstrand, 1992)

Postilla is a collection of 52 sermons, one for each Sunday. The thought behind it is two-fold. For the first part, how come priests are the only ones who have to work on the day their own religion designates as the day of rest? For the second, since no one really goes to church any more, maybe more people would come if the sermons were held by common people, on topics that are of actual interest? Priests could always have their sermons on Saturdays instead, and so people would not need to blame people for not going to church, because, well, on Saturdays, people are busy shopping.

Interesting concept.

The sermons are about a lot of different things, but they're normally just a page or two long. It's the Sunday of Big Lies and a Sunday of Small Lies, for instance. A Sunday for every season, a Sunday of Stress, a Sunday of Abstinence, a Sunday of Curly Foreigners, and so on. Every single topic under the sun, pretty much, done in an amusing yet thought-provoking way.

What's Richard Armitage doing in Beeston?

Humber Road, to be precise. He was walking down it, in broad daylight.

Right about here. Nice and sunny day too, like this.

And why was I sort of having a conversation with his "manager"? And who was I walking with? And why was his manager (a man) on Twitter under a fake name - a random woman?

It was very peculiar indeed. And if it sounds a bit weird, that's because it was a dream. Had it last night. For some reason, I ... oh hang on. I remember now! I was walking down said fairly non-descript street in the Nottingham suburb of Beeston together with Nat from the Richard Armitage Fanblog, for some reason. Perhaps because I don't know what she looks like in real life is the reason why I can't remember what she looked like in the dream?

Like this, and with jeans. But in the flesh.
Gorgeous isn't a strong enough word.

We came upon Richard Armitage's manager, who was also walking down the road, and we spoke of his charge. And speak of the handsome devil, he came a-walkin' toward us! From the direction of the shops on Queen's Road. Maybe he'd been to KFC or Subway. He was friendly and smiling and charming and SO NICE, unlike last time, when he was just uncomfortable. It was only a brief encounter, but it was a lovely one.

He was in town because there was a couple of shows he was in, at the same time (you workaholic, you!) - and I had got tickets for one of them, a stage production of BBC's Robin Hood. Can't quite recall the other one, unless it was meant to be The Rover? I hadn't got tickets yet, because I wanted to make sure he was actually going to be in both on the dates I was looking at going. So it was a chat mentioning those tickets and looking forward to seeing him on stage. We didn't want to hold him up too long, so the chat was kept brief and then he went on his merry way.

Then there was something about the manager being incognito on Twitter and mentioning our encounter there, and something about a Swedish sponge cake ("sockerkaka") that we had joked about. Good things dreams don't have to make sense! Then again, sockerkaka is yummy, and undoubtedly, so is Richard Armitage. So maybe it wasn't so far-fetched after all! :) The strangest thing is probably that my impression of him was "but he's not that tall after all", which is a bit ... wrong? FFS, he's two-thirds of a foot / ca 20 cm taller than me! That's still rather tall!

Ach, but what a dream it was. More where that came from, yes please! :)

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1 (2010)

Film review: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1 (2010), directed by David Yates

Instead of half-botching the book by trying to fit everything into one film, they've actually decided to let the final one be played out over a couple of films. Side effect: more money for Warner Bros., and more Potterverse for the fans, yay!
The trio have decided not to go back to Hogwarts, but in fact stand up and fight. Or at least try to find the remaining horcruxes that Dumbledore vaguely mentioned before he died. They get chased and spend a lot of time in a tent. They argue, split up, get attacked, get back together again and so on.

In this first half of the book, it's four deaths and a wedding, more or less. The downside is that I had just finished reading the book, so the things I wanted to be in the film weren't, and things were changed and bits were missing and all that. Some I can see the point of, such as that they didn't eavesdrop on Dean Thomas outside the tent, but others were a shame, like Kreacher turning out to be a really nice guy deep down and that all he needed was a bit of kindness. Or Lupin's angst. I was really looking forward to that last part! And nothing! For shame!

Because they haven't bothered to include certain things in the previous films, all of a sudden, Bill Weasley (Brendan Gleeson's son Domhnall!) drop out of nowhere and from nowhere, he's going to marry "hey isn't that the French girl from the fourth film, Fleur wossname?" (yes, yes it is). Their relationship was never introduced in the 6th film, so it's a bit of a surprise. And where's Charlie Weasley, anyway?

The Twilight Saga: Eclipse (2010)

Film review: The Twilight Saga: Eclipse (2010), directed by David Slade

See the cover? Four stars and "BRILLIANT" and all? Lies! It's all lies! Well, it is if you ask me. It's even more like chewing gum for the eyes than the previous ones. I can hardly remember what this was about - it was just not memorable at all.

Let's see. Furball and Sparkles were both fancying Bella. Sparkles asked Bella to marry him and she accepted. Didn't they do that at the end of the previous one? Bella acted like a total jerk to Furball, kissing him and stuff. Furball was about as charming as a cold sore - seriously, what's with Meyer and psychopathic boyfriends? Umm. And there was another vampire who was out to kill Bella, because Bella ... oh, who cares?!

The plus side - the werewolves are really cute in dog form. When they're in human form, they're all walking around bare-chested, unless you're a woman. Pack sexism that, dawgs! Bella walking next to doggie Furball echoed one of the Narnia kids walking next to Aslan. Does that mean Furball is now Jesus? I bet some people would agree.

Furry and Sparkles in a tent, albeit with a sleeping Bella ... crikey, anyone else think "hey hey, it's Brokeback Mountain!" ?

The Cullens with their pale faces still crack me up. They look so incredibly silly! Now, having read at least the first one, I think they've done Alice pretty well - she's probably the only one I could tell who it is just by seeing her. Nice to see Bella with her mum, even if Sparkles was lurking inside the house.

Funniest quote during the movie: Bella has just explained to the two rivals (Furry and Sparkles) that she's Switzerland, i.e. neutral territory. The Squeeze immediately quips, "She has all the Nazi gold!" And to think an internal joke (sort of) between me and the hubby is funnier than anything in the script is a bit sad.

No, this movie was kinda ... dull. There just wasn't much substance to it at all, just empty fluff that they could have shown in a much shorter time, if at all. Have heard they're splitting the final book into two movies. Surely that has to be proof of the non-existence of God? I really do hope the book is better.

Oh, and on a side note - I discovered the books in a Swedish bookshop. The Swedish titles are enough to make you run away screaming: If I could dream (Twilight), When I hear your voice (New Moon), The sound of your heart (Eclipse), As long as we both breathe (Breaking Dawn). Well, at least they are all very fitting with the content. For better or for worse.

Sagor för barn över 18 år by Tage Danielsson (1964)

Book review: Sagor för barn över 18 år [Tales for children over 18] by Tage Danielsson (1964), from Tage Danielssons Paket (Wahlström & Widstrand, 1992)

After having seen Sagan om Karl-Bertil Jonssons jul on telly on Christmas Eve, for the umpteenth time (it's a Swedish telly tradition), I went for the collection Tage Danielssons Paket, to look the story up, as the short story the animation is based on can be found in there. And then I decided to read it. Not just the story of Karl-Bertil, but the whole book it's from, Sagor för barn över 18 år ("Tales for children over 18 years").

Tage Danielsson (1928-1985) was one of the big Swedish comedians from the early 1960s until his death, one half of the very successful comedy double act Hasseåtage. He did more than just write for the stage, film and TV - he was also a director (his last film being an adaptation of Astrid Lindgren's Ronja Rövardotter), a poet and an author. His writing style in these tales for grown-ups is intellectual and clever, witty, and even though the tales are not for little children, he uses the same sort of tone, as if he was telling a story to children - just that the topics and the words are too difficult for kids.

Lizzie Leigh by Elizabeth Gaskell (1855)

Novella review: Lizzie Leigh by Elizabeth Gaskell (Manybooks.net/Project Gutenberg [1855])

Lizzie Leigh is a story about a family in the countryside somewhere, who carry a dark secret. Their daughter went off to Manchester and was dismissed from her place of work because of some sinful behaviour. On his deathbed, her father forgives her, in her absense, and once he's gone, the mother decides to let the farm and go to Manchester to look for Lizzie. In Manchester, one of the sons befriends an old drunk and his lovely daughter, a teacher. Could they aid the Leighs in finding their lost daughter?

I started reading this story on the plane from just Manchester, and the funny thing is, it begins around Christmas, with lots of snow and such. Perfect match! Mrs. Gaskell tells a compelling story of a mother's longing for her lost child, and the hope that she will be found and that she's not dead and buried.

Yuletide blessings to one and all!

This morning was a special event: the first full lunar eclipse on the Winter Solstice for about 400 years. In Nottingham, there was a solid cloud cover, so not much to see, unfortunately. Also, I woke up with my right foot hurting like the blazes, so I couldn't try to see if I could spot it anyway. This is what a lunar eclipse looks like, if you haven't seen one before:

First time I heard of one was maybe ten years ago or so, when I decided to set the clock in the middle of the night to watch it. I thought it would be a quick thing, like a solar eclipse (never seen one - there was a partial one in Sweden once, but again, cloud cover ... with rain), but it took such a long time that I went back to bed. When I got up around 6 or 7, the moon was still red! It goes on for hours! If you have the time and patience to wait all through it, or even just a few minutes, it's an amazing astronomical display. :)

I thought that I wouldn't join in with the Christmas wishes this year. There are so many different faiths in the world, and many different ones represented also in the Richard Armitage fanblogosphere. Servetus's posts about Chanukkah were an enlightening insight into the Jewish traditions for instance. As I'm not a celebrator of the birth of Jesus Christ, and not really a big celebrator of anything (terribly secular, me), the faith I'm closest to is that of Neopaganism, and today is the Winter Solstice. Or Yule for short!

Historia Calamitatum by Peter Abélard

Book review: Historia Calamitatum by Peter Abélard (Manybooks.net/Project Gutenberg)

Have I finally lost it, reading a book written some time in the 1100s by a French monk and philosopher? Well ... maybe? Or perhaps I just bought myself a Kindle for Xmas and went to Manybooks.net to download some free public domain books, and found it, went "ooh, an autobiography by Abélard! Sweet! I'll have that!" and then happened to have chosen it to be the first finished book on said e-reader.

Peter, or Pierre, Abélard was an important philosopher in medieval France, but the reason he's known today is more to do with his involvement with Héloïse d'Argenteuil, to whom he was a teacher. Epic Love Story, ticking two of my favourite romance boxes (age gap and teacher/student). They were very much in love, got married in secret after she had given birth to their love child (called "Astrolabe", I kid you not), but her uncle got cranky about their marriage and had some men attack Abélard at night, chopping his bits off. Then the star-crossed lovers ended up not exactly in a happily ever after, but rather dedicating their lives to the church. One's a monk, the other one's a nun. I heard about the couple and read their story on Wikipedia, to which my response was "that would be SUCH a great story for a roleplaying game!" - well, perhaps with a happier ending than this.

Anyway, this autobiography is about the history of his calamities, stretching from boyhood through to maybe a decade or so before his death in 1142. It tells about how he came to be learned, how he met and fell in love with Héloïse, how his bits were chopped off and how he lived afterwards with the church.

It's not an easy read, and by that I mean the actual language used. Lots of "methinks", "inasmuch", "thus", "forsooth" and so on. But if you disregard that (I found it difficult a lot of the time, but I can just play the "but ajm Sviidish" card), it's an interesting picture of medieval France that's shown. Abélard often talks of being persecuted and people are trying to kill him a number of times, when they're not wanting to excommunicate him, and he very often goes on a tangent to justify himself and his actions, often using quotes from various sources, such as the Bible. The whole thing is so full of self-pity at times it can get a bit over-bearing.

To start with, Abélard is actually a bit creepy when it comes to Héloïse, because he says straight out that he manipulated his way into the household just to gain access to the beautiful and learned maiden:

Thus, utterly aflame with my passion for this maiden, I sought to discover means whereby I might have daily and familiar speech with her, thereby the more easily to win her consent. For this purpose I persuaded the girl's uncle, with the aid of some of his friends, to take me into his household—for he dwelt hard by my school—in return for the payment of a small sum. My pretext for this was that the care of my own household was a serious handicap to my studies, and likewise burdened me with an expense far greater than I could afford. Now, he was a man keen in avarice, and likewise he was most desirous for his niece that her study of letters should ever go forward, so, for these two reasons, I easily won his consent to the fulfillment of my wish, for he was fairly agape for my money, and at the same time believed that his niece would vastly benefit by my teaching.

Creepy, manipulative bastard.

He then goes on to actually write about how much in love they were, so it takes the edge off a bit, but still, shady, wicked man!

The interesting thing is that he wants to marry her, and she doesn't want to, and is quite adamant about it. It would be such a scandal for him to have a wife and whatnot, because I guess philosophers were supposed to be chaste or something at the time? She didn't want him to ruin his good name. I like Héloïse based on this, she seems to have had some considerable spirit. :)

The Historia Calamitatum was a letter to someone, uncertain as to who the recipient was supposed to be, and it's known it ended up with Héloïse, who then wrote a letter pretty much in response to it. Have yet to read that.

As a Kindle book, when you've hit 75%, that's where it ends and instead goes into an appendix: a summary about the author and a historical explanation to the places and people mentioned in it. It's not a long book, and I thought the last 25% were a lot easier to read - obviously written a lot later in time and with easier words.

If you're into history, I'd definitely recommend it, even if it is a bit dull and preachy. If you're a sucker for the Abélard and Héloïse story, it's a must. And to think these were real people, living so many centuries ago! It really doesn't feel as if they're almost a millennium away from us in time, and their story lives on in this book and in surviving letters. There's even a cheesy movie made about them, and in case you're wondering, yes, I have it on DVD. ;) (Derek de Lint as Abélard, say no more!)

• Read Historia Calamitatum online at Project Gutenberg
• Download Historia Calamitatum in a variety of e-reader formats at Manybooks.net

Annie (1982)

Film review: Annie (1982), directed by John Huston

It's that time of year, i.e. coming up to Xmas, which seems to be a good indication that movies like Annie will be on. Why I'm not surprised, and why I'm sort of expecting it to be on just because it's December is a mystery - the movie is not Christmassy in any way, nor does it take place in the winter. The only connection I can see is that Annie wears a red dress with white trimmings and that they end the film with the Warbucks house covered in lights, but that's not a seasonal thing, it's a "look, it's a happy ending!" thing. Anyone got any ideas?

So, the film. Annie (Aileen Quinn) is a spunky kid in a run-down orphanage for girls, headed by the ghastly Miss Hannigan (Carol Burnett) - a drunk slut who seems to hate children, to be frank. One day, when Annie has been locked in the closet again for her latest attempt at escaping, Grace Farrell (Ann Reinkin) shows up. She works for the Wall Street millionaire Oliver Warbucks (Albert Finney), who has decided it would be a great PR stunt to have an orphan to stay for a week. Annie is of course the child to get picked.

Mr. Warbucks's home is huge and luxurious, but Annie soon finds her feet - and a haircut, a bath and some new clothes too. Mr. Warbucks, however, wanted a boy child and wants to return Annie to the orphanage, but gets persuaded to let her stay. After all, it's only for a week ...

But a lot can happen in a week, such as the stony hearts of mighty millionaires can melt and become paternal to orphans and husband material to certain members of staff. If only it wasn't for the sleazy scumbag of an orphanage keeper's brother (Tim Curry) and his gal (Bernadette Peters) to show up and threaten to spoil the fun.

This is a film I have seen plenty of times growing up, but I hadn't seen it in a long time now, so it was a lot of fun. I was concerned the movie wouldn't be as good as I remembered it, but actually - it was. The child actors are really good, both at acting and singing - especially Aileen Quinn. (Plus, how cute is Molly?) She really has some tremendous guts! And she got a Razzie for it and all. For shame!

The gruff Mr. Warbucks is ... well, gruff, and while he softened during the movie, I wouldn't call him a dreamboat, no matter how many Duesenberg cars the man has. (He seemed to have got through the Great Depression very well, and very quickly, considering this is supposed to be 1933 ...) Miss Farrell is a lovely woman, even though she was a little too quick to soak up Warbucks's oddly phrased compliments. And what sort of self-respecing woman would say this?

Warbucks: You're teeth are crooked.
Grace: I'll have them corrected.
Warbucks: I like them crooked.
Grace: I'll leave them as they are.

(Or something to that effect.)

The star of the show, though, has got to be Carol Burnett. The woman is hilarious! From stirring a bathtub full of booze to kissing the radio, shouting at the orphaned girls or bashing her rascal of a brother over the head because you can abuse children all you like, but murdering them is going a bit too far. Superbly acted and the woman is an absolute comedic legend.

It's a cute, feel-good film with lots of catchy music. I've heard there's a 1999 remake, supposed to be more along the lines of the original musical, but I've not seen the remake, nor have I seen the musical. Annie, to me, is this film. And I really enjoy it. I thought, as it's been years since I saw it last, that it wouldn't be as good as my childhood memories say, but no, it was still pretty good, funny and enjoyable. Both thumbs up and maybe cleaning the house will be more enjoyable with a bit of music. It's a hard-knock life, but the sun will come up tomorrow ... after all. :)

Robin Hood (2010)

Film review: Robin Hood (2010), directed by Ridley Scott

What do you get when Ridley Scott decides to tell the legend of Robin Hood? A very long film that could just as easily have had characters called Peter and Evelyn or something instead of Robin and Marian. I mean, if they've buggered up the myth this far, why not just rename the characters and thus make for a much better film?

Because yes, that bothered both me and the Squeeze. I pretty much loathe BBC's Merlin for how they've adapted the King Arthur myth. Had they only renamed the characters to something more inconspicuous, it would have been just an okay fantasy show instead of one that after the first episode had be proclaim it was an insult to the myth, and the only true Merlin was the one played by Sam Neill in 1998. See, I don't have quite the same attachment to the Robin Hood legend, funnily enough, so I'm not too bothered about how much the BBC messed it up with their latest adaptation. However, I do get a bit aggressive when it comes to historical accuracy.

Which this film sadly lacks.

We start in France, where King Richard is plundering his way back from the Holy Land. Robin Longstride (Russell Crowe) and his merry men are there too, of course, along with a certain Robert Loxley. The king gets killed in battle, trying to take a castle. No mention of his being held for ransom in Austria, and he's very good at speaking English too, for a man who could only speak French.

Locksley is going to England to deliver the crown and the message that the king is dead. He gets ambushed by Godfrey (Mark Strong) - the Gisborne character, sort of - and his men, and dies, but not before being found by Robin and asking him to take his sword back to his father for reasons of [enter father/son sob story here]. Robin agrees, and assumes the name of Robert Loxley, delivers the crown and witnesses Prince John be crowned King John. And then heads off to Nottingham.

In Nottingham, he meets Marion Loxley (Cate Blanchett), who was the wife of the late Robert. Robert's father is the blind Sir Walter (Max von Sydow, biggin' it up for the Swedes, y'all!) who suggests that actually, why not have Robin pretend to be Robert? So he does.

So not Guy of Gisborne.

Meanwhile, the dastardly Godfrey, who had such a nice head of hair back when he was Mr. Knightley to Kate Beckinsale's Emma but now seems to be very fond of the skinhead badass look, is trying to take over the place by using French soldiers, and prepare for the French king to invade. Because that obviously happened in real life ... and then Prince King John's moral compass is confusing.

The Sheriff of Nottingham (Matthew Macfadyen) is not the Big Baddie at all. He hardly has any screen time, and when he does, is he doing any big badass stuff? A clue: no. Disappointing, it really is. He just has a beard and looks a bit cross. At least Godfrey gets enough time to establish himself as an unredeemable swine. He's not a Lost Soul or anything, he's just downright nasty.

While it's not a bad film, it's pretty good - lots of battles and swords and arrows and trying to burn people alive and that sort of thing, if you're into those kind of films - but it's over two hours long (156 minutes for the director's cut, 140 if not) and ... well, it's just a bit long. No matter how nice the costumes are or however you feel about Marion donning chainmail and fighting the French on a beach and Friar Tuck keeping bees in order to make mead ... it's just a bit long. Cut for pace, you know?

Well acted, nice scenery and set design and battles that were a lot better choreographed than the clunky stuff they did in the BBC series. Not bad. Not brilliant, though. Good enough to not feel you've wasted a good part of the evening in front of the telly. It ends with what seems to be "and here's where the legend begins", as if to say it was some sort of prequel. Say what? That doesn't make much sense. But oh well, there is one thing to be happy about: at least this Robin Hood has an English accent. Not exactly sure where the hell his accent is supposed to be from in England, but at least it's not from somewhere in America.

The Last Airbender (2010)

Film review: The Last Airbender (2010), directed by M Night Shyamalan

While we didn't get around to watching this film at the cinema, we wanted to see it simply because we really enjoyed the animated series. Now that there's a live action version, it's a must-see! Or at least that's the mindset we had during the opening credits.

The Last Airbender follows a couple of teenagers from the southern Water tribes - Katara (Nicola Peltz) and Sokka (Jackson Rathbone) - and how they find a child and some sort of huge buffalo-like creature encapsulated in ice. The child (Noah Ringer) turns out to be called Aang, and he just happens to be the Avatar.

The Avatar is a person who in every lifetime is the keeper of the balance between the four Nations (Earth, Air, Water and Fire). However, Aang, when being faced with a lifetime of resonsibilities and no option of ever living a normal life, bolts. He's gone for a hundred years, and because he's gone, the balance of the world is thrown off, and the aggressive Fire Nation subvert the others.

Every Nation has a number of people who can control ("bend") their respective elements. Katara is the only one left among the Water tribes on the South Pole and Aang is the only one left of the Airbenders, as the Fire Nation slaughtered all of them. However, Katara is only a beginner, and Aang - who as the Avatar can speak to spirits and is supposed to be able to master all four elements - can only master Air, as that's as far as he got in his training before he ran away. Together, they have to try and learn more about their respective crafts, so they make their way through the lands, inciting rebellion amongst the Earth benders.

The Sorcerer's Apprentice (2010)

Film review: The Sorcerer's Apprentice (2010), directed by Jon Turteltaub

Ways to attract my undivided attention even though you've never really caught my eye before: dress up like a wizard à la Harry Potter and wear a really cool coat. And yeah, having your beloved trapped inside some sort of magical prison so you've got the brooding thing going on as well ... doesn't hurt. Nor does the glasses in that deleted scene.

No really, trust me on this one. If you thought it's a lame movie becuase it says "Disney" on the cover and their DVD:s are godawful because you get like ten minutes worth of Disney ads before you get to the main menu, well ... okay, it's not brilliant, but it's good fun. And less lame than I thought it was going to be, judging by aforementioned logo.

We get the back story first, how there were powerful sorcerers roaming the earth. One being über-powerful and good Merlin, and one of them being super-evil Morgana le Fay (Alice Krige, last seen in Skin) and her evil henchman Maxim Horvath (Alfred Molina). Merlin had some apprentices, namely Balthazar Blake (Nicolas Cage) and Veronica (Monica Bellucci), and in order to defeat Morgana (or something like that), Veronica absorbs her soul, but Morgana ends up taking the reins of the body, so Blake traps their body and souls in a nesting (Russian) doll, called a Grimhold.

28 Days Later (2002)

Film review: 28 Days Later (2002), directed by Danny Boyle

For someone who isn't into zombie films, I seem to have watched a fair few of them over the past year. The latest one is 28 Days Later, but I have an excuse. We went to a zombie themed birthday party - we dressed up as zombies and watched a zombie film in the city. Actually, the Squeeze went as someone who had been bitten but hadn't turned yet, and his fake blood around the head was so convincing a couple of people actually stopped him to ask if he was okay! :) I went as a zombie hunter, armed with a blood-stained stick of wood. By the way, if you want to make fake blood, mix golden syrup with red food colouring and some cocoa powder (to make it darker). It's really sticky and quite tasty ...

Anyway.

The film opens in an animal research lab, where some animal rights activists break in, in order to set the chimpanzees free. Because I feel very strongly about animals, seeing these wonderful beings trapped in small perspex cages was awful, but I kept thinking "it's a film, they don't actually have to live in there". A scientist discovers the activists and pleads with them to not let the chimps out - they're infected with a virus that spreads through blood and saliva. Of course, his pleas fall on deaf ears and a chimp is set free ... only to viciously attack one of the would-be rescuers.

Fade to black.

Four weeks (i.e. the eponymous 28 days) later, a man - Jim (Cillian Murphy) - wakes up in a London hospital bed. He discovers that the hospital is deserted, as is the city itself. Something has obviously happened. These "somethings" come to attack him, and he finds himself rescued by a couple of people. One of them being a woman called Selena (Naomie Harris). They fill him in on what has happened, namely that a vicious virus broke out, and the whole of the UK has been evacuated.

Jim and Selena end up finding a man (Brendan Gleeson - whom my internal monologue spent the entire moving saying "is that Brendan Gleeson? Kinda looks like him, but I'm not sure it is. Is it? Maybe not. Or ... maybe, I dunno" and so on until it was confirmed in the credits) and his ~13-year-old daughter (Megan Burns), and together, they set off oop North to try and find a gathering of soldiers, whose message they've heard over the radio, saying they can offer protection and a cure to other survivors.

Shhh ... we're hunting zombies!

And so it turns into a roadmovie, until the soldiers are found. They're headed by Christopher Eccleston, and that's a guy I seem to have seen a lot recently. I reacted with an internal "oooh! Christopher Eccleston, yay!" before I realised that actually, I'm not that keen on him, so quit with the excitement already. I rather liked Sergeant Farrell (Stuart McQuarrie) as it happened. Seemed to be a decent fellow amongst ... a bunch of savages. What could possibly be worse - being ravaged by hungry zombies or by randy soldiers?

The last bit there was rather disturbing to watch as a female. Partly because they were seriously wanting to have extremely wicked ways with an underaged girl and partly because the adult woman was doing the right thing in the circumstances and tried to get them to take her instead, to protect the girl. Chilling reminder of the sort of things women have had to go through over the course of history.

If you're into Cillian Murphy, you get to ogle parts of him I had no desire to ogle whatsoever. As in, when he wakes up in the hospital bed, he's stark bollock naked. Oh yes, we're not talking boiler suit shots here, we're talking full frontal nudity. Problem is, I completely lack a Cillian Murphy attraction. It's more of an aversion, if anything, even though he's a good enough actor and everything. Just can't stand the sight of him! So I'm afraid the opening shot was a bit lost on me. ;) Murphy fans, however, can ogle his anatomy in all its bony detail for all they like.

Overall, it wasn't too gory, compared with some other films. Not scary either. More a movie about survival rather than just cheap shocks. Thought the shots of a deserted London were very poignant. It's so odd and unusual to see it void of any human life that those images in themselves are disconcerting. Anyway, it wasn't perhaps the most enjoyable of films as such, as we've already established zombie flicks aren't my cuppa tea, but it was definitely a good movie nonetheless. And considering we saw it in the company of friends dressed up as zombies, in the smallest cinema in the world, you can't really go wrong. :) (Note to self: Book place for own birthday party in summer and show a non-zombie film!)

The Ladybird by DH Lawrence

Novella review: The Ladybird by DH Lawrence (1923)
from a Book Club Associates omnibus (1980)

Set near the end of the First World War, in the late autumn or early winter of 1917, we meet Lady Beveridge, who goes to visit the war prisoners in a hospital somewhere in England. There, she meets someone she regognises from a time in Bohemia in Germany - the Count Johann Dionys Psanek. She mentions this to her daughter, Lady Daphne, who starts visiting him regularly.

They have a sort of friendship going. He once gave her a thimble with his crest on, a ladybird. He wants her to sow him a shirt, and so she sows him a shirt. And then she sows her husband a shirt too, and then the husband comes home from the war. And at first, she's thrilled, but then not so much, because war changes people.

The war ends, the Count is no longer near death with a bullet wound upon his person, so he's invited to Lady Daphne and her husband for a bit, and one night when she can't sleep, Lady Daphne hears a man singing in a foreign tongue - it's the count. And then she ends up being his "wife by night".

Funny + fantasy + film? Yes, it could work ... possibly?

Okay, let's start with one that didn't really work terribly well ... Epic Movie:



And one that sort of worked ... Kröd Mändoon and the Flaming Sword of Fire:



And one that looks like it could be a heck of a lot of fun when it comes out, Your Highness. Enjoy! :)

With regards to the recent cold snap ...

What happens when Britain has a sprinkling of snow

It's been cold and snowy in Britain recently (although today and during the weekend, we're going to have about +5°C, so nice and relatively warm), of course, being from Sweden, I've had a lot of "but of course, you're used to much worse!" comments. Which is true. -17°C certainly won't break any cold records even in the part where I'm from (which is around Gothenburg on the west coast, so definitely not "oop North").

However, Sweden has a neighbour in the east, where it does get very cold in winter. Because if you think even -20°C is cold, think again. The Finns are decidedly unfazed, because they're well hard, innit. No really, they are. Which made me think of a funny list I read ages ago, which I managed to track down and then translated:

15°C - It does not get hotter than this in Finland, so we begin here; the Spaniards put on caps, winter jackets and gloves. The Finns sunbathe.

10°C - French try in vain to start the central heating in their houses. The Finns plant flowers in their gardens.

5°C - Italian cars will not start. The Finns are cruising in their convertibles.

0°C - Distilled water freezes. The water in Vantaa River gets a bit thicker.

-5°C - People in California almost freeze to death. The Finns grill the final sausage before winter.

-10°C - Brits start up the heating in their homes. The Finns put a sweater on.

-20°C - Aussies flee from Mallorca. Finnish Midsummer celebrations stop, autumn has arrived.

-30°C - People in Greece die from the cold and disappear from the face of the earth. The Finns start drying their laundry indoors.

-40°C - Paris cracks and crumbles in the cold. The Finns queue at the hot dog stand.

-50°C - Polar bears start evacuating the North Pole. The Finnish Army postpone their winter survival training until it gets properly cold.

-60°C - Korvatunturi freezes. The Finns rent a movie and stay indoors.

-70°C - The fake Santa moves south. The Finns get frustrated because you can’t store Kossu (Koskenkorva) outdoors. The Finnish Army goes out on winter survival training.

-183°C - Microbes in food do not survive. The Finnish cows complain that the farmers' hands are cold.

-273°C - ALL atom-based movement stops. The Finns start saying "Perkele, it's cold out there today."

-300°C - Hell freezes over. Finland wins the Eurovision Song Contest.

Well, actually, with regards to the final point, Finland actually won the Eurovision Song Contest in 2006 (much to everyone's shock surprise), and as far as I'm aware, hell hadn't even frozen over ...

Lordi: Hard Rock Hallelujah!

Detective fiction or romance? Any preferences?

Here's something I wrote for a creative writing course. These were our instructions:

You will try writing two different versions of the same story. The first story should be a detective story; the second one a romance.

Following is your topic: two people meet after having been separated for 20 years. One of them has stayed in their hometown, and lives a traditional family life; is married and has two children. The other person left home in her/his early twenties and experienced various things that you are free to imagine. /.../ It should be clear to the reader why they meet again after all these years. There must be a conflict of some kind. Is the conflict something that happened recently/is about to happen, or is it an old conflict that has been going on for decades.

It couldn't be more than 400 words either, but I changed a few bits to post it here (according to the feedback the teacher gave me at the time), so it might be slightly different than it was to begin with. Anyway, here's my take on that task ... We begin with the mystery/detective drama version of the story:

Fish Dock, Grimsby, Lincolnshire

GRIMSBY, LINCOLNSHIRE, 1849

Aldous Bentley never could get used to corpses, especially not when they once had been acquaintances. He grimaced at the body stretched out in front of him, a sheet pulled up to its pale, grotesquely bloated chin. The smelling salts could not disguise the foul stench of death which permeated the air. Somehow, he had always thought he would be the one first one to go. Out of the two old school friends, it had been he who left home early, travelled around, been a good-for-nothing nobody as his father liked to put it.

Mordechai Simpson, on the other hand, had always played it safe. Never one to wander, he had apparently stayed in Grimsby, become a fisherman like his father and grandfather before him, married some local girl and started a family. Yet he was the one who had been tied to an anchor and dumped into the sea for some inexplicable reason.

Simpson had had the audacity to get himself murdered before he had had a chance to tell Aldous whatever it was the man had to get off his chest. Highly annoying.

Aldous had returned to Grimsby on a whim, happened upon Simpson late one night, and was told there was something important he needed to tell him, but at the time, Simpson was in a rush and now it was too late. Whatever it was, it must have been important. Obviously, or he would not have lost his life over it.

'It is him.'

Putting his hat back on, he nodded at the policeman. Outside the cold, grim room, he discovered a woman pacing up and down the corridor. Aldous thought himself a gentleman, and had therefore volunteered to identify the body, to spare the widow.

'Mrs. Simpson?'

Turning around, she was astonished to find she recognised the man who had spoken, but she was not pleased to see the man who had once left her without as much as a good-bye. His bow was returned with an ever so slight curtsy.

'Mr. Bentley.'
'You look well. Unlike your husband.'
'So it is true?'
'I am afraid so.' He hesitated. 'Annie, I am sorry.'

'Pray tell me what for! That I am now a widow and my children fatherless, or the fact that you decided you were too good for me and left without so much as an adieu?'

And then we move on, to the same scene, but seen from a different point of view, and with a different genre in mind.

GRIMSBY, LINCOLNSHIRE, 1849

Pacing up and down the chilly corridor of the morgue, she heard a door open and close behind her. A man spoke her name before she had a chance to react.

'Mrs. Simpson?'

Turning around, Anne saw a man she had scarcely expected to lay her eyes on ever again. Aldous Bentley was as handsome as he had been all those years ago; a proud figure of medium height, broad shoulders and auburn hair. He still had the same peculiar green-brown eyes that she had once found so alluring. Why, she could no longer remember.

He gave her a bow, which she returned with an ever so slight curtsy.

'Mr. Bentley.'
'You look well. Unlike your husband.'

Faint hope that it was all just a dreadful mistake left her, she could feels tears burn in her eyes.

'I am sorry, Annie.'

Sorry! Anger flared up and joined grief and she had to stop herself from giving him a good slap. Oh, yes, he was sorry, only twenty years too late, and in the wake of her husband’s death. The nerve!

'Pray tell me what for! That I am now a widow and my children fatherless, or the fact that you left without as much as an adieu?'

'Both, actually.' A hand clad in brown leather touched her elbow; she shook it off, but it returned straight away. It felt oddly reassuring, and she did not approve. Not here, not now. 'I could never hope you would wait for me, but I never knew … could never dream that you would marry him of all people.'

'He is …' Anne corrected herself, 'was … a good man. Better than you ever were. He was there for me. Where were you?'
'You could have gone with me.'
'You never asked! One day you were gone, never to be seen again.'

Everyone had been expecting him to ask for her hand and she had longed to accept, so when he suddenly left Grimsby without so much as a by-your-leave, she had been devastated. All that love gone to waste had taken her years to accept, even after she pretended to have moved on. Fearing he was lost to her forever, Anne had eventually agreed to marry the man who was now lying dead in the other room. She had grown to love Mordechai Simpson, and now all she had left was confusion.

I realise it's probably a "slightly" biased readership of this blog, but never mind. What do you prefer personally as a genre, detective fiction or romance? And which version of the story above do you prefer (if either)? Do you prefer it because you prefer the genre it's supposed to be, or is it more down to one being better written? Sorry for asking lots of questions - I'm just a bit curious to try on a bunch of different genres to see what I actually prefer writing. Or rather, what my strengths are. If any. (*kicks herself to stop being so bloody low in the self-esteem department and to quit putting herself down all the time*)

So yes, any feedback you have is greatly appreciated, as always. :)

Let's talk about books!

Was going through Marvin (the desktop computer) to find some files, and came across this, which I believe was posted on Facebook a couple of years ago or so. So not necessarily very up-to-date, but anyway. Here goes:

1) What author do you own the most books by?
Technically, Carolyn Keene, but on the other hand, they’re not all mine and besides, they’re all at my parents’. Seriously though, we’ve got probably 100+ Nancy Drew books! Sheer number of books aside from that … Bengt Linder. My collection of books about Dante and Tvärsan is almost complete. :D

2) What book do you own the most copies of?
Hmm. I’ve got a few doubles of Jane Austen books now, as I decided to get a new batch from the same series (Wordsworth Classics) to make it look nice and consistent.

3) Did it bother you that both those questions ended with prepositions?
Prepo-what-a? :P

Ciarán Hinds as Aberforth Dumbledore

I was googling to find a picture of Ciarán Hinds as Aberforth Dumbledore. Found this:

Has a thing for goats. Hence the goatee? Har har.

THAT'S Ciarán Hinds?! But but but ... it looks nothing like him? Hard to judge by just the one picture. Maybe it will be clearer in the actual film itself. But still, looking at that photo, it really looks like someone else?

THIS on the other hand:

Yup, that's definitely him.

Oooh one of the Mr. Rochesters with a wand. I could swoon for less!

Either way, I can't wait for Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2 to come out. While waiting, I really should be working on the review of Part 1, so I can gush over how brilliant it was. Yes. But first, sleep.

EDIT: Bright and early (and very cold) morning, and a good night's sleep later, I've realised where the confusion lies. Aberforth Dumbledore, the character, is only shown in Part 1 as an eye glimpsed through the mirror Sirius Black gave Harry Potter. Harry thinks it's Albus Dumbledore he sees. The character as such isn't going to be featured until Part 2, where he plays a small but significant role as the innkeeper of the Hog's Head in Hogsmeade.

However.

We've seen the Hog's Head before. That's where Dumbledore's Army convened the first time, in Order of the Phoenix (HP5). Hence, we've also seen Aberforth Dumbledore before, even though at the time, we didn't know it was him. And as he never had a part bigger than that of a barkeep in a seedy pub, there's no need to have him played by a big name. In fact, looking at the cast list of HP5, there's just a "Barman" played by Jim McManus - I believe that's him. But as we in retrospect know that the barman of the Hog's Head is actually Aberforth, all the fansites have the character Aberforth Dumblefore down with screenshots from HP5, and once the final film has been out, no doubt the pictures will be replaced with HP7:2 screenshots instead.

So the first picture is of course not Ciarán Hinds - it's Jim McManus. Sorted! :)

Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow ...

Another day full of snowing, so I thought I'd share what it looks like outside the house at the moment! There's about 4-6 inches or 10-15 cm or so here, and temperatures are set to drop.

Nice afro there, bird table!

I also put together a little video for illustrative purposes! :)



What's the weather like at the moment where you are?

Spooks 9.8

Why must all good things come to an end?

Before I could write this post, I felt as if I had to watch the final episode again. It was a while ago since it was broadcast, I really should brush up a bit. Working from home because of the adverse weather conditions has allowed me to do so. Oh shush, I can multi-task. :P

So, geared up with the laptop and while researching some marketing opportunities, I put on the final episode of series nine of Spooks. In which the John Bateman / Lucas North story comes to a head. Lucas North is declared a rogue agent and has to be found and brought in. Meanwhile, said rogue agent is busy trying to avoid getting caught while get his hands on the Albany file. He even sets up a diversion and kidnaps Ruth, leading Harry to hand him the Albany file. And it all ends with Maya getting shot while she and Lucas are trying to get away, and Lucas deciding he has nothing left to live for.

Where to begin?

A few things bugged me, especially on a re-watch. The only one I can think about right now, which is an odd place to start, is that the Albany file was locked away in an X-Box looking case which in fact was a laptop. How long had the laptop been hidden in that church? Even if electrical equipment isn't switched on, it still leaks power. Put a laptop away for a good few years and you're not going to be able to boot it up just like that and hey presto, there's the state secret. THE BATTERY WOULD HAVE BEEN DEAD! Like every time I don't use my PSP for a while, I always have to charge it up before I can use it, sometimes before I can even switch it on. Laptops are the same. Yet this one booted up in seconds (as always on TV) and not so much as a "low battery" warning.

Less geeky an observation is how quick Harry went from "we cannot possibly give him the real Albany file, even if Ruth's life is in danger" to "here ya go, you're welcome". This is a high-ranking MI-5 officer we're talking about, who has done a very good job at keeping the nation safe for more than a decade, and then, on what feels like a whim, he betrays his own country because of some misguided trust in an agent that has proven he cannot be trusted, all because of a fellow agent. An agent he happened to have proposed to in the first episode of the series, but an agent nonetheless. What's more important, the life of one person or the lives of billions of people all over the world? Did he know Albany was a dud all along?

While the whole genetic/ethnic weapon is a plot hole in itself, I'm not going to list it as such, simply because such a weapon would be impossible (as viewers have already pointed out) and that's the whole point. Albany doesn't work. The reasons might be different in real life, as opposed to what they say in the episode, but the crux of the matter is that it wouldn't work as a weapon and the show says as much.

The guy Lucas hired to run - okay, first of all, if they wanted to stop him running, they could've just shot him in a leg and tackled him to the ground. They didn't have to bloody shoot him. Especially since anyone who has ever seen Lucas North run can clearly see that the hooded man running there was in no way played by the same actor. The running styles are totally different. Lucas is efficient, fast, looks like he knows how to run. Mr. Hoodie looked like he could've had a light backpack bouncing up and down and as if he was running to catch the school bus. What-a mistake-a to make-a, eh?

Ruth, Ruth, Ruth ... while you don't have the icy chill of Ros, by gods, you're awesome in so many other ways. Ros was the epitome of cool - she didn't even need sunglasses. Ruth is more the sort of bow-down-to coolness. What can this woman not do? She can speak Mandarine, for starters. She can also really act, although that's not Ruth, that's Nicola Walker. The scene where Lucas anaesth... puts her to sleep, and the fear she portrays is marvellous and leaves me speechless. Hats off to you, Ms. Walker! I hope we'll see more of Ruth in series to come!

Harry got to strip down, although without any gratuitous nudity shots or boiler suits. Also, Harry when he was on the phone to Lucas, just after handing over Albany ... my word, he was almost ... a heartthrob! Even for me!

I wonder if they're going to keep New Guy on as an agent next series. He doesn't seem like the average crumpet spook (Richard Armitage, Rupert Penry-Jones, Matthew Macfadyen), but I guess that's what Dimitri's for. And also, he has that rugged sort of look and there's something there still, all right. New Guy, that is, not Dimitri.

Maya, as a character, doesn't grab me. She hardly gets to say or do anything, and in this episode, she seemed flatter than normal. So New Guy (Alec? Alex?) gets to her and tells her about John/Lucas and she finally thought he "made sense". No luv, he makes less sense as a character now than he did dating that horrid Sarah Caulfield! Personality? None. She's a doctor and just somehow, I thought she'd be really clever, but she just seems to hog the background and be boring. Don't care much for the character, and I think they should've given Laila Rouass more than that to work with.

And Dr. Maya died.

And Lucas/John was heartbroken.

And part of me wanted to cheer, for various reasons. The primary one being "woah, 'e's a well good actor, inn't 'e?" but also because good, that means the end of a fairly boring character. John's taste in women was indeed a peculiar one.

The crying felt real. Well played, Richard Armitage. You know how your voice can get all funny when you've got tears lurking and crying wants to jump out of your throat but before that, it just sits there and makes you sound weird. That would be difficult to act, I reckon, and the man did it beautifully.

Another thing he did beautifully was going from nice ol' Lucas, hero-of-the-day ex-inmate of a Russian prison, to John Bateman, certified psycho. It's really chilling. Perhaps because in real life, he seems like such a nice guy and from what we've seen of Lucas before, he's a decent guy too, but suddenly - he's a cold-blooded killer, who doesn't have qualms over how to execute a friend and co-worker. And be so calm about it! That's what I find really creepy. You could argue that he has a heart, because he does everything for Maya ("it was all for you!" - that's what a lot of these telly baddies say, especially after doing particularly horrible things to other people), and he does tell Harry where to find Ruth before it's too late. Perhaps there could be good left in him.

But he died.

We did know that he tried committing suicide when he was in the Russian prison, so that had been set up in his character earlier on. Which I had actually forgotten about when I saw the episode where he goes to visit Malcolm in the end and it was all a sham, because the house was empty. That's when I thought "I can see him being able to kill himself". And thus concludes the story arc of Lucas North and John Bateman. By jumping off a building.

And I didn't even feel (too) sorry for him.

Which is another sign (at least for me) when an actor is really good at what he does. If it's an actor I really like, it takes a lot to not just make me think "I know he's an awful man, but umm, he's played by X and dangit, I still think he's hot!" When I, instead, think "I can't believe I'm seeing a character played by X and I actually DON'T fancy the pants off him!" If you know what I mean? When the gruesomeness or horridness of the character manages to override the fact that the actor is one of the most attractive men on the planet.*

John Bateman, you creepy bastard! I don't care that I much prefer Richard Armitage visually in this series as opposed to series seven, where he's way too skinny, but gosh, no, John Bateman is not welcome into any fangirly daydreaming. A shaggy-looking, chip-munching Lucas North is welcome any day. I'd cook him a hearty meal to put some meat back on those bones (before jumping them would be considered), but Bateman? I'd leave him out in the cold. With a snow shovel. Our drive could do with some clearing, it probably has about 4"/10 cm worth of snow on it.

How on earth did he have the time to set up all those elaborate things anyway? Car, satnav, clothes, surveillance ... Did Phineas & Ferb help him, or how else did he get all those things done in such a short space of time? Is this one of those times where we need to suspend our disbelief to get along with the plot?

Anyway, the final episode wraps up the story of John Bateman / Lucas North and sets up for a series ten which could potentially be the last of the show. How can Harry weasel his way out of "you did give up state secrets"? If he goes, the show goes. Simple as that. At least I hope he'll get to retire with Ruth, so that they don't have to do the spy thing, but can start decorate Christmas trees and stuff together instead. Bake cookies.

Even if Richard Armitage is out, I think I'll still be watching series ten. Just to see what happens. Have followed Spooks for three series in a row now, so have sort of got attached to those two. And, let's face it, aside from some seriously strange turn of events in series nine, Spooks is still a very good show. Even though we never did get to see any actual kitchen table shagging. (An awkward photo doesn't count.)

John Bateman, how ironic that you were shagging a doctor. I really don't think you were very well. You would have been institutionalised, yes, but in a mental health unit. Going back to prison was never really an option, but at that point, you were too deluded to realise that. You poor, screwed up thing.

I shall forget all about Caulfield from series eight and put all about Maya and Vaughn/Michael and John from series nine out of memory. And all I shall be left with is the guy who brought in the donuts.

Rest in Peace, Lucas North. You will always be my hero.

* An example of this, and even more so, was watching Dead By Sunset, when I was so repulsed by Ken Olin's character that I actually managed to forget how ridiculously tall, dark and handsome he is in that production, and instead, wanted the character's head on a spike. At the very least. (... Except when he was in the shower. Wowza!) But then again, rape, brutal murder, bullying, abuse and torture of your wife isn't sexy. It really isn't. John Bateman is nothing but a cute li'l puppy in comparison. Especially considering John Bateman was made up - Brad Cunningham was based on a real person. ICK NO!!