In a nutshell

Monday to Friday, I normally post book, film or TV reviews. Rest of the time, it's general mayhem. Expect frequent gushing about handsome actors (mainly Richard Armitage) and Jane Eyre. Also: this blog won't display correctly in IE, go fig.
Certified member of the Estrogen Brigade since 1996!

Saturday, 19 March 2011

What if Richard Armitage was gay?

What would you do?

No, I mean that sincerely.

Would it change anything?

Would you be disappointed? (After all, if he was gay, he wouldn't be interested in you, regardless of how far-fetched the fantasy of meeting him in person is or isn't.) Would you enjoy his works less? Or, would you perhaps like him even more? There are plenty of women who love to hang out with gay men, and hanging out with Richard Armitage - I can think of a whole host of worse things, for sure.

The question of Richard Armitage's sexuality has popped up before, I'm pretty sure, and I'm not going to provide a definitive answer to it, simply because the only one who could give a definite answer it is the man himself, and he ain't here. I ain't hiding him in a closet or anything. Pun intented.

What would be the arguments for "oh he's gay, alright!" then? Well, it could be argued that the man was seen with a man going to some awards ceremony (his agent, actually), he's been in a musical (musical artists being gay could be said by some many to be a truth universally acknowledged), he's rarely seen with a woman and when he is, they're likely to just be friends rather than lovers (the whole Annabel Capper discussion, which I think says more about the fans than it does RA & AC). He also knows about style and is artistic and has an iPhone and he's sensitive and nice and all that.

None, of course, have anything to do with a person's sexuality.

Is there really any evidence of him being either gay or straight? He's been together with plenty of women on screen, but the man's a seriously good actor. Why do we all just assume he's straight? He might well be, but what if it would turn out that he isn't? Would it make a difference to you as a fan of the man and his work?

If yes, may I ask why?

What's it to do with you? What's it to do with any of us? Why should we be bothered one way or the other? Whatever he chooses to do in his bedroom is nothing no do with us, after all. It's his personal life, and it should be kept private. Maybe, if he was gay, he would be another case of "all the best ones are either taken or gay", and at the moment ... he doesn't appear to be taken. But that still doesn't mean anything.

So, what do I think? Personally, yeah, certainly, it would spoil the fantasy a bit if he was gay. Still none of my business, though. I'd still enjoy his acting, still swoon over his good looks and fantastic voice, and be happy that there's at least one man out there who is a good example to other men. Plenty of gay actors out there, so he'd just be another one of many. And somewhere out there, there might be a very lucky lad instead of a very lucky lass to capture the man's heart. And as long as the man's happy, whatever he chooses to do with his life, I think we should be happy for him.

The song below puts it so well:



The way I see it, it's okay to be gay, regardless of who you are.

And no, I don't really think Richard Armitage is a homosexual, but at the same time, I'm wary that that opinion may just be wishful thinking on my part rather than any serious analysis. But on the other hand ... no, I really do believe he's into women. He hit on Keira Knightley thinking she was Natalie Portman, and the scenes with Alona in Between the Sheets were very convincing. So ... sorry lads, I'm afraid he's still ours. :P



This post is part of FanstRAvaganza 2, a Richard Armitage fanblogging event running 14-21 March 2011. See all FanstRAvaganza posts from this blog. 

This year's other participants: An RA viewer's perspective from 33°0'S of the equator, Avalon's Blog, CDoart, Confessions of a Watcher, From the Quill Tip, Me + Richard, Mesmered's Blog, Nevermind, Mr. Armitage, Phylly's Faves, RA Frenzy, The RA Fan Blog, RA Vids & Graphics, The Spooks Fan Blog, and White Rose Writing.

75 comments so far. Share your thoughts:

Anonymous said...

I really don't care if he is gay or taken! I didn't know he has an Iphone - that is not a hint to be gay by the way.

Fabolaktuko said...

I have to say, you are brave and I admire you for it.

Very difficult question.One thing is thinking it might be so, and another is knowing it's so. Do I think he's gay? No, I don't believe so, but I also don't really know him.

To be entirely truthful I think for me it would definitely change the "romantic fantasy" of RA that lurks somewhere in my heart. (I'm talking pure fictional fantasy here,not any RL romantic liaison!)

But what certainly wouldn't change is the admiration for the man for his considerable talent and for the lovely person he is. It wouldn't change my enjoyment of watching his work. It wouldn't change the attachment to the great characters he's created and will create. He would still be the intelligent, funny, and hard working man whose work I respect and support.

The man has a right to privacy and I hate when actors, or anyone in the public eye, are asked "the question" about their sexuality. It's up to the individual, whatever they feel comfortable with saying or not saying.

Musa

LadyCassia said...

This is a very hot topic. I would appreciate the point of judiang on her blog "Confessions of a watcher", due to the excellent psycological analysis of Gisborne she is offering this week!!

My opinion: gay or not changes everything, because we all project our ideal of male in RA and his characters. In case he is not interested in women, this spoils the game completely!

Jonia's cut said...

o_O OMG! What a topic.
That will be unfair. Dudes have all the best: Ricky Martin (we have only Enrique...who likes Enrigue?..If I'm asking Ricky or Enrique - answer is almost always Ricky), John Barrowman, Neil Patrick Harris, Alan Cumming, Sir Ian, Chad Allen, Rock Hudson, T.R. Knight, Rupert Everett, Matt Bomer etc. They have all the best! What we have: murders (Bertrand Cantat), boxers (Chris Brown), rapists (too many of them).
We have right to have one normal dude...well...a little to workaholic...but straight.
But that will not change my opinion about him as person and an actor. I like John Barrowman very much and I think that Scott his partner is very lucky man. :)

Darkangel66a said...

I have to say that, for me, it would make absolutely no difference. Yes, my chances would drop from zip to nil (but we are talking a .00000000000000001% chance anyway). I however would wish him to be happy in his life and comfortable in his own skin. I would still think he was an amazing actor, who was both skilled and drop dead gorgeous. I would not stop fantasizing about him or his many characters and he would still make me melt.

I'm exceptionaly open minded when it comes to sexuality. That probably comes from the fact that my brother is gay, and I love him dearly. He is the best of men and I daily wish away all the problems that being gay in a straight society brings. I accept my brother for who he is as I would accept anyone for who they are.

Though I've been told this is a strange comment, I believe that two men loving each other, is romantic. It's truly the last forbidden love. The Romeo and Juliet of our time. Two people who love each other so much that they would defy family and society to be together. In my opinion, that is romantic and beautiful.

So, we will probably never know for sure when it comes to Richard, but I would support him no less and I would wish him all the happiness in the world, either way.

Traxy said...

@Anon: About the iPhone - well, that it isn't is kind of the point. ;) Could've said a Mac instead, because Macs are quite designery and designery things go hand in hand with homosexuality, a lot of people would say, but I don't know if he has a computer. He does have an iPhone, though, so that had to do as an example!

Musa: I was a bit nervous posting it, but got some words of encouragement and decided to go ahead. (Not scared of arguing online probably helps!) I agree with you on every point. Very well said! :)

LadyCassia: Here here! :) I don't think it would be too much of an issue what he does in real life, because the character on screen isn't him. On the other hand, when I saw Peter O'Brien in Queer As Folk, that was incredibly weird! I knew him as Sam Patterson in The Flying Doctors and there he was, snogging a MAN! Very strange.

Jonia: Hey, we also have a lot of brilliant men who aren't criminals or boxers! The vast majority of men are decent blokes, just like RA, and would be offended at a comment like "every man is a potential rapist" because they would never do such a thing to a woman. On the dude side: John Barrowman and Alistair Appleton ... rowr. They are disturbingly hot! Especially Appleton! *fans herself*

Darkangel66a: A beautiful and very wise comment. Thank you for sharing! :) There are lots of females who are quite obsessed by the thought of two men together. I'm not quite sure why that is, but I can't help pair people up on screen either. Peter and Caspian in the second Narnia film. Just get a room already!! ;)

joanna said...

You are brave but i don't even wanna go there. He is very smart and i belive that knows what is best for his actor carrier. In the end i beg you forgive me my english.

Jonia's cut said...

Alistair Appleton!!!!!!!!
THIS IS UNFAIR!!!!

Poliana said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
PoliCBA said...

Sometimes I wish he was married with children because this doubt is kind of disturbing, don't you think? It's how I feel about it, at least.

And I say that because I can't deny that, if he was gay, it would spoil the fantasy a bit, like you said.

Naturally, his sexuality is none of our business and, even if he was gay, it certainly wouldn't change my admiration for the brilliant actor and for the lovely person he is. But it would kind of break my heart... *laughs*

P.S.: I must ask you to forgive my eventual ESL (English as a Second Language) errors. I'm a Brazilian woman trying to communicate with others RA fans around the world. :)

mulubinba said...

I've been following the comments of some of the Gay actors who have "come out". There is a feeling still that discrimination exists in the acting field whereby a gay actor will not be cast in a romantic lead. Several actors have been fighting this belief and have tried to encourage others to come out - Ian McKellen is one of them; Stephen Fry is another and John Barrowman of course. JB has had some romantic leads and these actors dispute that their careers have been affected by coming out. I still suspect that huge discrimination exists however and I think it is a courageous move for them to tell the public they are gay.

As a person who is enthusiastic about gay rights along with a number of other equal opportunities issues, it would not make one jot of difference to me pesonally if Richard Armitage was gay or heterosexual. My only concern would be what impact it might have on his casting if he was in fact gay. Ian McKellen and company might say their careers took off when they came out, but I don't recall Ian ever being a romantic lead. (Happy to be corrected).

Sorry for the long answer! In answer to your question: No, it would not make any difference to my enjoyment of his acting skills. I would respect him in any form of longterm monogamous relationship. I would respect him less if he flitted in and out of marriages/relationships like some of the Hollywood stars do. I actually prefer not to know too much of anything :)

myownmania said...

Nah my opinion won't change at all. In fact, nothing of what I think about him, his work etc would change. I guess my feelings about this have a lot to do with my "theatre kid"ness where quite a portion of the male theatre population is homosexual and you reach a point where you pretty much just don't pay attention to such things anymore. I know we still faint and thud about very openly gay theatre performers like Gavin Creel and Wes Taylor much the same as we would RA. At the end of the day, if it doesn't really harm anybody, then it's all fine.

MillyMe said...

Rupert Everett, Richard Chamberlain and Colin Firth (not gay) have said that gay actors have a much harder time getting roles. Sir Ian didn't come out before he was 47, past the age of leading men parts. This still seems to be the reality that actors meet out there.

Personally, I hope Richard has found, or will find love. It is an essential part of being fulfilled as a person.

hedgeypig said...

Whilst I fully appreciate your right of free speech to post this I find it very uncomfortable reading. I ask myself if there was proof somewhere would I click the link and the answer is probably yes.

Would I care - no. Do I have the right to know - no. I'm therefore rather torn. And that's why I feel uncomfortable about this post.

Fundamentally I guess I can't see the point to it. It's just conjecture.

It's perhaps human nature to want to know but we have to realise that it's all just fantasy, none of us knows Richard. I'm not one of those to stick the bloke on a pedestal and think his farts must smell of roses but he does have a right to sleep with whom he wishes without us, the tabloid press, Uncle Tom Cobbley and all speculating on it. Same goes for anyone in the public eye - unless it's deemed in the public interest. Not sure Richard's bedroom shenanigans constitute a topic in the national interest. But hey you never know.

Jane said...

I think it is a great and sensible post on a touchy subject. It is not gossipy and not making any assumptions about RA's orientation, there is no "proof" behind those links, they have nothing to do with him. Discussions about this topic are often either forbidden or invaded by trolls, but I do think it is in the human nature to wonder, it is not a crime to ask. What I object to is spreading unfounded rumours and presenting personal theories as facts and I don't see this happening here.

For me I don't think it would make a difference, it certainly doesn't with regards to other actors/musicians/whatever. But I have to confess that I would prefer to know and be done with it. I'm too much of a sceptic by nature not to consider the possibility as long as there is no hard evidence either way except his own words. But then, considering the possibility is not at all the same as considering it very likely.

Ania said...

If, I repeat, if RA would be gay wouldn't have changed my adoration. Although I'd feel deceived, not by RA but by myself. Because it's my fault, what and how I think about RA.
Besides I think he has the right to do everything to be happy.

pi said...

This is a hot topic and it has many layers.

For now, suffice it to say that I hope he is not gay. The fact is, that would be knowledge of him that breaks the boundaries into personal intimacy; the knowledge would colour my relation to his characters, especially considering the fact that he lives in leading man territory. Acceptance of gayness does not mean that I would be able to set aside what I know about him from the character anymore than I could set aside knowing that Mel Gibson is a violent misogynist. It matters, because the thoughts do intrude. In the end, biology trumps all. It's a fact. Not to mention, it would mean that when he talked about wanting to be married, it would be an utter lie. If he didn't mean it in the normal way then he should have zipped it.

The gay label is placed on people way too often these days because some people think it's an edgy thing. It just makes them amazingly naive, IMO, and dumbs down genuine discourse.

joanna said...

Several years ago polish popular male singer said that he want to be married with his girlfriend. Lots of photos and confetti....This year I learn that his girlfriend is hot and have mustache.

Jane said...

Yes, it does happen and it wouldn't if part of the audience still wouldn't feel it makes a difference even if it shouldn't. However, it is impossible to tell from a certain behaviour if it "means" something or not. Some are publicly dating/marrying women and are in fact gay, some just feel more comfortable with keeping their personal lives under wraps without having anything to hide that could harm their career.

joanna said...

You are right:)

Anonymous said...

My feelings are that RA has a right to his privacy and that it is none of our business whether he is gay or not, but I also understand people's curiosity about it.

I totally agree with hedgeypig's comments above. I'm sure that I too would click on a link if it told us for sure whether or not he is gay, because it would end all this speculation about him.

I wonder what his family, friends and loved ones think each time this subject repeatedly comes up. But then they are probably to only ones that know one way or another.

This subject also makes me extremely uncomfortable. However, I know that if RA is gay, it would be the fact that he had not been truthful that would devastate me, and maybe others, the most.

He has said in numerous interviews that he wants to get married and have children. Is this what he really wants or is just saying this because he thinks it's what we want to hear?

It would be the fact that he had purposedly been deceitful that I would find very difficult to accept.

Nevertheless, I want him to be successful and happy in his personal and professional life, whatever that means for him.

Nat at RA FanBlog said...

I can see hedgeypig's point of view and know why many fans feel uncomfortable with this topic, although it doesn't make me uncomfortable personally.

Do we feel unloyal to Richard, like we're gossiping behind his back?

Having said that...
When it comes to Richard's sexuality, I'd still enjoy RA's work and swoon over him either way. I'm in love with my husband... RA is just my fantasy crush, so his personal life isn't part of my reality. Although I'm curious by nature, I acknowledge it really isn't any of our business.

Anonymous said...

This is a brave and interesting thread and our reactions to it are perhaps the most interesting of all.

We'll probably never know what is going on with him and I like it that way. I do know, however, that I would be more disturbed to find out that he was straight and sleeping with everything that moved, than to find out he was gay or bi. However as the thread is pure conjecture if he was...
Would it change what I thought of him as an actor? -NO. In fact as he is one of the most effortlessly masculine presences onscreen, it would make me think more of him.
Would it change what I think of him as a person, i.e. the getting married, having kids comments? - NO. I have a gay friend who would love to be married and have kids (admittedly with a man!) also perhaps his publicist told him it was about time to mention marriage to play to the sappy females amongst us.
Would it change my attitude towards him as a fantasy figure in my life? - NO, my fantasies are just that, fantasies! I can separate reality from my rich dreams. And perhaps it would add an extra dimension... he he!

So perhaps, we need to look at the reason why he couldn't come out if he were that way inclined. Casting directors would have trouble casting him in the same types of roles. Leading men can be gay as long as they are 'character' leading men - not handsome leading men. And let's not forget John Barrowman became really famous while playing a guy who fancies everyone and anything as long as it was breathing so for him to come out wasn't a stretch. Also action actors cannot be seen to be gay (even though there are bound to be some that are). Even in today's enlightened society it would be career suicide to come out. Importantly, he has a vast female fan following which would be perhaps put off if they found out he were gay...so maybe we are part of the problem.

If he is, the only thing I think would be sad is that he couldn't enjoy the openness that comes with a relationship which you can show to the world. There must a great many partners who can never go along to Oscars etc.

judiang said...

Sigh, I wrote a long reply and Blogger ate it. In short Traxy, I commend you for this post. I may try to reconstruct the reply but bedtime calls.

Jane said...

I would be interested in more sensible voices on the subject. Usually, when it comes up on places like IMDb it is a mess and in general very negative, people have their theories they are convinced of, but also often saying it would be a major put-off.

re the lie/deception aspect of it: it would be about a bit more than the remark about wanting to get married and generally hinting that he fancies women. A few years ago he has been more specific about past and current girlfriends though he never gave names. I'm inclined to believe it was true what he said and that this discussion is hypothetical.

But I couldn't bring myself to get worked up about it should he have lied. When a celeb comes out, I don't recall that they are accused of lying/deceiving the public. I consider it a white lie, a necessity to protect one's career and privacy. The problem is the world outside that cannot accept it. I remember when Ricky Martin came out, some people joked that now they want their money back for the records they bought, which is obviously nonsense as they sound as they did before.

judithj1 said...

I feel where there is smoke there is fire and there are a lot of references to his being gay out here in the blog sphere. A lot of things about him just suddenly came together for me a few months ago and I am utterly convinced he is gay amd is concealing it for the sake of his career. I have no
Prejudice against gays and am very close friends with some. I have even had bad crushes in a couple of them but to no avail. Folks can't control their sexual preferences and that's the way it is but RA is no longer my fantasy and I won't be going to see him on the big screen. I don't visit the fan blogs anymore which is kinda sad since he has some very talented fans who show so much creativity in their homages to him. Outing ruined Rupert Everett's career and will do the same to RAs I expect but at the same time I do admire his honesty, which I can't really say about RA anymore.
I

Jane said...

If you go by "when there is smoke there is fire", everyone would be gay. You can look at any random actor's IMDB page and find gay chatter and people that claim to know something. It is nonsense. I'm not sure to which references you refer but as far as I'm aware there is absolutely nothing from a reliable source that points in the direction. You can be convinced of it if you like but it makes no sense to be convinced of something you cannot know, may that be gay or straight. That's what I admire about Traxy and other bloggers, making clear that we don't know anything for sure. People are wondering as so little info is available and that is fine but it is not the same as jumping onto conclusions.

As to Rupert Everett, as far as I'm aware he has always been out and did have a career, though perhaps not the career he could have had otherwise. He has not only been out but wrote a pretty scandalous autobiography and has a reputation of being awful to work with and recently had cosmetic surgery that went wrong. So I would say other things ruined his career. John Barrowman also always has been out and is very successful, as are some other young and handsome actor that are out even if there isn't much talk about it.

Traxy said...

joanna: Nothing to apologise about, your English is fine. :)

Jonia: I know! That's 90% the reason to watch Escape to the Country! (Yeah, I'd say a whole 10% because I like the sort of houses they find and where they are - wish I had a house like that too!)

PoliCBA: I agree with you - it would spoil the fun a bit, but at the same time ... he's still the same guy underneath. And your English is fine too! :)

mulubinba: Wise words. I can't think of those men being cast as romantic leads either. Still, it hasn't stopped JB or Neil Patrick Harris really (when seeing him as Dr. Horrible, I didn't even know he was gay, but it was a small production so maybe that doesn't "count" as such?). Still ... RA without being a romantic lead? Perish the thought!!!

myownmania: "if it doesn't really harm anybody, then it's all fine" - indeed, words to live by!

MillyMe: I think you can still be fulfilled as a person without having a long-term partner, but having one sure make dreary days a bit brighter! :) I too hope he'll find someone some day and settle down and ... yeah, perhaps even start a family.

hedgeypig: "If you don't like it, don't read it". ;) Joking aside, you make some good points. None of the links in the post are actually RA-related anyway and the purpose of the post is merely to question the attitudes of us fans with regards to RA and his sexuality rather than RA's sexuality itself. I'm curious as to why we feel the need to discuss the matter at all. After all, he's not sleeping with any of us, so what difference does it make? I've never seen a blog post where someone else questions my sexuality, but on the other hand, I'm not a celebrity so I really can't see why anyone would even come up with the idea. ;) And also, why is this sort of subject you'd get thrown out of certain forums for even bringing up? We're fans, we want to talk about the object of our affections, that's just a part of human nature. Why are we so preoccupied with whom a stranger might or might not invite into their bedroom? Beggars belief really, doesn't it?

Traxy said...

Jane: Thank you. No, gossip mongering really wasn't my intention. Playing with people's curiosity and stuff, yes. :) It's natural to be curious and sometimes if a celebrity is ambiguous it's more "damaging" to them (certainly if they feel they're living a lie) than if they were to just come out and be done with it. Sportsmen can have tremendous issues if they come out, but an actor? Probably just met with a collective shrug from the world in general. The people who'd be most upset if RA came out would probably be ... us. And to live your life a lie just to please fans is not exactly ideal. To protect a career, okay, perhaps. On the other hand, there's no actual evidence of him swinging this way or the other, as far as I know. He could be very choosy or simply not have time for a partner. Maybe he's really romantic and wants to find "The One" and maybe that person hasn't been found yet (I do hope he finds that person some day, though). Part of the issue is, I think, that if a guy is genuinely nice and respectful to women and sensitive and artsy, he's likely to be passed off as - you guessed it - gay. WHY IS THIS?! What's the matter with simply being a GENTLEMAN these days?

Ania: Well said, I very much agree. :)

pi: I think you're absolutely right. Who can look at Mel Gibson in a film these days without the slightest bit of disdain for his conduct off-screen? Who is going to watch Two and a Half Men or Hot Shots! without thinking "hey, there's that crackpot Charlie Sheen!"? Not to mention how difficult it is to set aside Tom Cruise's personal beliefs watching ... anything. So what a person does in real life does impact how we percieve them on screen. Saying that RA wanted to get married and have kids some day, if he meant "to a bloke and adopting" ... yeah, I'd probably feel a bit cheated. Even though it's got nothing to do with me in the slightest - I've already got a husband that I wouldn't give up for anything in the world! So how we respond to things as fans is an interesting topic.

joanna: *laughs* Too funny!

Jane: It would be so sad if that was the case for RA. It doesn't seem fair to have to live your life under wraps and hide away your true self just because of your career. That's no life. :/

Anon: More wise words. :) Yes, if there was a link to a reputable source saying he's gay, I'd click it just to end speculation, and because I just couldn't NOT click it - it's a story about my favourite actor, of course I want to read it. The deceit, yes, that would hurt, but at the same time, I have to ask myself "but how has he deceived you? Were you dating him?" because in a way, surely it would only be a proper deceit if he had done it to me personally. If someone's involved as a partner or friend or family, that's one thing, but as a fan who is definitely never going to go out with him and probably never even MEET him ... how could he have deceived any of us? We've made assumptions about him based on a heterosexual norm of society, but that's about it. Tricky subject.

Nat: Yeah, I don't feel uncomfortable about the subject either - we're talking by a person in the public eye, and as such, all manner of different topics come up that we'd never even consider if it was someone at work or a neighbour or something. (Would you ever discuss whether or not your boss has chest hair in 18+ pages on an internet forum or dedicate numerous forum threads about the shape of your neighbour's nose? It would be funny, but I seriously doubt it!) RA is a fantasy crush for most of us, and life would just go on tomorrow regardless of the gender of the person he might take to bed. :)

Traxy said...

Anon: Yup, lots of interesting comments have been made. It's a great read, if a bit hard to try and respond to everyone! :) I agree, if he was a slut (for want of a better term) or a serial monogamist to girls half his age would probably bother me more as well, to be honest. It's funny with John Barrowman, really. He auditioned for the part of Will in Will & Grace and was turned down because they thought he felt "too straight" (JB? Straight? In what alternate universe?) and instead, they gave the part to ... a straight guy. o.O

judiang: I hate when that happens. :( Although sometimes, when it returns something about comment being too long, if you go back, it has actually posted it anyway, but perhaps not this time. Oh well. (Funnily enough, WordPress did a similar thing with one of my comments on YOUR blog a while back! Blogging karma? Gasp!) Thank you nonetheless! As they say, it's the thought that counts! :)

Jane: Agreed. With Ricky Martin, my reaction was "didn't he come out years ago?" because I'm sure a (gay) friend of mine in senior high used to say RM was gay. Or maybe he was just experiencing some wishful thinking. ;)

judithj1: Would you care to elaborate? I don't think I've seen a single blog stating he's gay, and I'm actually really curious to know more about what the "lot of things about him" that "just suddenly came together" for you are. I'm not questioning you or your convictions in any way, I'm just curious to know what happened and what made you convinced of RA being gay. For me, the idea has been mentioned before but I didn't actually consider it one way or the other. When listening to all the interview MP3s available for download I could find on one of the fansites, there was one which had my gaydar go off. Can't remember which one or what it was about, but suddenly the thought crept up on me, tapped me on the shoulder and harrumphed. It didn't convince me, it just made me think "OMG, what if?" so I'm curious to know how your conviction came about. What did he say/do? Especially since your opinions of him have obviously changed as a result of this.

Jane (again! :)): This is very true. Especially if you're of the opinion that we're all bisexual anyway, even if we may never actually act on it or even know we are. :) I can't say "RA is gay!" on my blog because ... well, if I'm not convinced it's true, I'd be lying and I tend to be (bluntly) honest about things. Then there would be the point of if it was stated as a fact and it's proven not to be true and RA takes offense, he could have a team of lawyers track me down and sue me for slander. While it would be awesome to hear from RA's "people", I'm not keen on those people being lawyers, if you know what I mean. ;) But mainly, I don't want to jump to conclusions and state it for a fact when there's no hard evidence whatsoever. If he came out in a newspaper or on TV or something, sure, I'd be writing up a post about it this instant, but he hasn't. I'm not even sure I like to speculate about it, which is why the post itself is kind of non-committal and just "well he might be, he might not be, it's nowt to do with us and as long as he's happy then we're cool". :)

Anonymous said...

He has said in an interview that he wants a "wife" and kids, as well as getting married. If he was gay then surely he is not being truthful? And it would be more than a little white lie to me.

I think that he should tell the press that the subject of his personal life is private to him and not up for discussion.

If he were dating girls half his age or we were seeing pictures of him with a different girl every week this would bother me too.

He's extremely good at being private. We hardly ever see him in the press unless he's attending an awards ceremony or being interviewed for his next project. This maybe fans the flames of curiosity about him

All these things aside, he has many wonderful qualities that I admire about him.

And there is no getting away from the fact that he's extremely easy on the eyes and can act the socks off most other actors out there with his hands tied behind his back.

He's definitely hard working and I look forward to seeing which roles he chooses in the future.

I'm sure that I would still be watching him portray whichever characters he chooses in the future, whether or not he is gay, but I'm sure that the fantasy balloon would be well and truly burst for me.

Anonymous said...

When RA used to send his fans messages a few years ago, I recall that he used to use quotes from other famous people as maybe a way for us to live.

These are just a few of the lines from these that stick out in my mind about being truthful.

"This is what should be done by one who is skilled in goodness.. let them be able and upright.. straightforward.. let them not do the slightest thing that the wise would later reprove.. to write truth first on the tablet of one's own heart.."

Interesting words when connected to the comments on this thread.

Anonymous said...

If we believe that he himself believes in that there is no reason to doubt that what he said about himself was truthful, even if he won't ring the press (or announce it on twitter as one apparently does these days) as soon as he has started dating someone new.

LadyCassia said...

Very well girls, it's almost one week and discussion goes on and on on this subject....Of course RA can do what we want in his private life, we has to do his choices, we wish him the best career possible, we respect whatever sexual preferences, BUT the most of all hope he is not gay down deep inside our hearts. We cannot deny this.

DayGlow said...

Great question! Personally I'd be THRILLED to learn he's gay. Then I could stop fantasizing and get back to my real life. :) BTW I respectfully disagree with the person who said where there's smoke there's fire. The media is full of rumors--that's how they make a living.

This is my first time on your site--thanks for hosting. :)

DayGlow said...

Here's why I definitely don't believe he's gay. If you watch the interviews, it seems like if it's a woman interviewer, he's much more charming. Has anyone else noticed this? For example, in the Hobbit press conference, the look he gives the woman questioner is very different from the one he gives the male questioner. The vibe I get is shy straight man. I'm guessing he'll lose that when international stardom comes (as I know it will). Maybe I should be saving these old interviews.

joanna said...

@ DayGlow I have noticed. I alvays think...run Rich, run away. NOW.AT THIS tIME!!. Don't you suspect that these are his thoughts too?;):):),

DayGlow said...

Hey, you could be right!! Maybe that look is half heterosexual charm, half trying to look calm and getting ready to run if she gets out of control. :):) With men he looks more relaxed. Just saw the interview in Hungary about RH series 2, it was really great.

DayGlow said...

Here's the link to that interview: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RZKm3_QGwI8

joanna said...

Thanks DayGlow:):)I am sorry.I just must...SQEEEEEEE!

Tara said...

RA has always set my Gaydar humming right from the first and I'm not at all sure why. So while I don't care one way or another if he is or isn't, I would not be a bit surprised if he came out sometime in the future. On the other hand, if he gets married and produces a dozen children, I wouldn't be too surprised either.

I've never "dreamed" about him in the sense that I've panted over other actors, because I'm older than he is by enough years as to dampen my ardor a tad. But I have seen him in many things and definitely find him fabulous. I wouldn't be crushed to find him batting for the other team the way a single thirty-something fan might.

Mostly I just want him happy and successful, as I wish for anyone and as I know every other RA fan does.

Anonymous said...

I just stumbled across this post - I was a little surprised that you went there, but it's an interesting discussion. I'd be lying if I said the question hadn't crossed my mind.

While I wouldn't be terribly shocked by such a revelation, that's not exactly the vibe I get from him. I'm assuming here that in his early interviews, before he learned to "perform" in that setting, we are seeing his most natural public self. If that's the case, then he reminds me strongly of a lot of engineers I know (and believe me, I know quite a few) - intelligent, methodical, introverted, and rather dull. It makes me wonder if his terrible secret is that he's a boring workoholic who doesn't have much of a love life.

Traxy said...

"It makes me wonder if his terrible secret is that he's a boring workoholic who doesn't have much of a love life."

Weeeeeell ... That he's a workoholic isn't exactly a secret. He's already out of the stationary cupboard on that one! ;)

Whether or not he's an introvert is a question I've been pondering over the past week. Might make a post about it at some point. :)

kaprekar said...

You do realise Traxy that this post will get more hits than any other on your blog because of this topic!

For me the issue would be the consistent lying.

Traxy said...

@kaprekar: It's already the most commented post in this blog's history, which is fun! :)

Jane said...

It will forever be be your most hit post as lots of people google RA gay that, along with RA girlfriend. And I'm afraid that this post exists and will come up via google will in the eyes of some add to the impression that "when there is smoke there is fire".

Traxy said...

Currently shows up as #7 on Google.co.uk if searching for "richard armitage gay". I'd be more worried about Gay Spy from Digital Spy (3 & 5) and Yahoo! Answers (6), to be honest, as I'd class them as more authoritative sources. (Top spot, btw, is a post made by Nat in September '09. :))

June said...

Hi Traxy

I love your blog. I am curious as to why you think Digital Spy and Yahoo Answers would be more authorative sources on this issue. Having checked out both it all seems more of faceless people on the internet who probably don't know anymore than we do.

servetus said...

Just wanted to say that I support you writing on this topic, even if I feel unable to comment on it substantively or speculate (as that is all it would be) publicly. Great post, and I appreciate the "sensible voice," as it's something a lot of people wonder about.

As far as the blogging goes, anything to do with Mr. Armitage's relationships will end up as the top post on a blog. The top post on mine is the first thing I wrote about Annabel Capper. There must be a huge number of people googling about him in general anyway. For instance, there's a woman who writes about the frugal lifestyle who jokes occasionally about being Armitage's girlfriend and those are the most popular posts on her blog, as well.

Traxy said...

@June: I was thinking about number of users, which lends credibility (although I wouldn't trust Yahoo! Answers as far as I could throw it). Digital Spy is one of the biggest entertainment sites in the UK.

@servetus: Agreed! It could be argued that posts like that are a good way of generating visitors, although that was not the intention behind writing the post. Just wrote it as I thought it fitted in with my F2 theme. :)

Avalon said...

50 comments, wow Traxy, nothing like a controversial topic to bring out strong emotions. Brilliant post, as always from you:)

First of all, I am asexual myself, so I do not hold any sexual prejudices in my heart for gayism.

Second of all, my only fantasy with RA is with Guy of Gisborne, well maybe Lucas from time to time, and as long as those roles are straight, I can fantasize. It seems movies roles are the only thing that sways me from my asexuality.

I would still love RA's acting. I might not fantasize as much about him.

What if he is bi? Wonder how his fans would react then?

joanna said...

@Avalon
Richard Armitage-bi?
Sqeeeeeee:D

DayGlow said...

I agree with Jane that curiosity about RA's sexuality might mess with popular searches and create smoke where there's no fire. Maybe it's best NOT to search this topic on the internet?

I really believe he's straight, despite the musical theater, etc. (I think Anonymous is onto something with the workaholic nerd theory.)

On the other hand *hops self-consciously onto soapbox*, I don't think badly of gay performers who are dishonest about it. Discrimination is real and making a living as an entertainer is tough. People have a right to do the work they love, and if that means lying about your personal life, I'm OK wih it. (My daughter is a musician and an out lesbian. That's the best choice for her, but she pays a price for it professionally.)

Judith Johnson said...

He's gay and I can't fantasize over him anymore so he has lost me. Plus he isn't very emotionally generous to his fans, he always acted like the fans were a bother on the RA Army site. I think the most telling thing is the way he kisses his leading ladies. Pretty insipid! Look at Jason Isaacs for example, it doesn't matter if he is kissing a male or a female, he is so into it and them. Many actors play gays and do it very credibly. I would find it interesting to see RA do a role like that!

Traxy said...

@Judith: If he is or isn't doesn't really matter, you could still have fantasies, as they're never going to come to any sort of fruition anyway. ;)

In what way do you mean that he's not "emotionally generous" to his fans? From what I've read from and about him, I would have to disagree.

judiang said...

Checked this thread for the hell of it and it's STILL going!
Judith, please share how you came to be convinced of his sexuality. I am seriously curious.

chintzy said...

Very interesting thread. I have no idea about Richard's sexuality but I do work in musical theatre and can assure you there are as many straight guys working as there are gay ones. Every time I start a new show or have a cast change we have the same conversation as to who is and who isn't, it shouldn't really matter in this day and age but we still do it.

Without being stereotypical, you'd have thought that ballet boys would have all been gay but the vast majority of them are straight and married with kids and some of the stories from tours they do would make you blush for a month! Some of the gay guys I work with could pass for straight any day, anywhere (there's one who has the men, and women, lusting after him - if you didn't know you'd never guess just by looking at him or by his way of acting or speaking. Also, some of the straight boys will 'camp' it up sometimes or be quite flamboyant, it doesn't mean anything.

It sometimes seems that there is a different set of rules when you work in the theatre, that 'anything goes' but it's probably just the same as anywhere else. Gay performers are more open about it in the theatre world but I think once they are on tv/film, producers and big-time investors have quite a large say in things and it's all played down. It shouldn't make a difference but if a studio has a handsome leading man they need him to be straight (whether he is or not) it all comes down to revenue and returns. It seems that straight actors can play gay characters but openly gay actors can't play straight ones!

My apologies for wandering 'off topic' but I just wanted to explain a bit about theatre life to people who might have preconceived ideas about it's performers.

PS Without meaning to be rude JudithJ comes across as a little bit bitter!

Holly said...

I came late to this conversation but I would point out that RA was a little more forthcoming before that infamous article concerning the school trip and the tent which caused him such excruciating embarrassment and for which the journalist involved was rightfully censured. Since then he has said absolutely nothing except, "I don't put it about. I never have." He has also indicated that he has had several live-in relationships, the last of which, (and about which he was very hopeful), has lately ended. Never once did he "kiss and tell" and a gentleman never divulges names. His comment is clearly true, especially as his behaviour, both personally and professionally, has always been utterly impeccable and has earned him the warm, even affectionate, regard of the ladies with whom he has worked. No smell of scandal or reprobate behaviour of any kind has ever accrued to his name excepting, with reference to this matter, by veiled remarks and snide hints by those who wish him ill.

Being so quiet and private and unfailingly charming, It's hard to imagine how he ever earned the relentless loathing of one person in particular who has pursued him from afar and used to post on forums and discussions devoted to him or to the shows in which he played a significant part. She caused a considerable furore some time ago on BBC America's "Robin Hood" forum and has posted at great length on others where her vicious comments, which took much time to prepare, earned outrage. A conversation such as this is grist to her mill and to like-minded others as, if she could destroy or diminish his career, she most certainly would. Beware, then, of all comments that state categorically that he is gay unless he, himself, says so! You don't know from whence they came nor what prompted the poster's motivation. It's only human nature to speculate and this discussion is a fair one but when it is stated categorically that something is true but the remark is unsubstantiated and the insinuations are merely that; insinuations - but growing ever stronger if the poster senses uncertainty, then I respectfully suggest you ignore them completely. The Net is rife with such rumours and practically every public personality is subject to them. Some sites are notorious for propagating them. Not everyone who posts on RA's many forums is well disposed toward him, although it serves a purpose to be seen to be so.

He has always struck me as being a shy, creative and somewhat introverted man who lives in his head and for whom books and music hold a powerful attraction. I suspect the comment concerning engineers could very well describe him.

Traxy said...

chintzy: The comment about musical theatre was a joke. Of course you don't have to be a homosexual to work in that environment! :)

Holly: AMEN to that! *applauds*

Jane said...

Thanks, Holly. There are most certainly a few people out there that wish to harm RA's personal and professional reputation respectively are obsessed with idea that he is gay. One has to keep that in mind when reading posts and wondering if there is something to it. And lets not forget, some people, gay men and straight women, want there favourite actors gay because the thought turns them on. Nothing wrong with that as long as it is confined to slash fiction but sometimes fiction and reality get muddled up. Some of those fans (of another actor) apparently did go so far to plant online evidence by pretending to be the actor in question and posting on gay dating sites or something like that.

Traxy said...

Jane: People really do that? o.O WTF is wrong with them?!

Cat Winchester said...

This post still seems to be going so I'll add my two cents.

I have rather a broad experience of gay men, being that I probably saw more of them when I was growing up then I did straight men. My gaydar is second to none and I have never gotten a gay vibe from RA. Of course you usually notice these vibes most when they're not acting and RA doesn't have a lot of on screen interviews under his belt so I could be wrong but right now, that's my vibe.

How would I feel if RA did come out as gay?

First let me say that if he is, I really hope someone doesn't out him, that's just cruel. While homosexuality is becoming more acceptable, it still isn't considered "normal" and it should be every persons choice if the wider world knows or not. Seriously, it's not just acting where it can affect your work, studies have shown that if you have anything that can be seen as "gay" on your CV you are less likely to be asked back to an interview. We live in a cruel world and while some people really want to know every single detail of their idol's lives, we should never forget that in our quest for information.

Now, as to how I would feel about it. Absolutely fantastic! And no, it's not because I like slash fic or find the idea of two men together hot.

The reason I would feel so great about it is because straight men scare me. Really. I'm always terrified that they'll get the wrong impression, that they'll see my banter as a come on or just won't get my bawdy and teasing humour. With a gay man though, that pressure isn't there. I don't care what impression I'm giving them because the possibility of having sex has been removed. I feel free to be myself around them, to flirt with them and even if I like them, to tease them mercilessly! I don't take myself seriously and my family often tease each other. With a straight man that I liked though, I'd be worried that my teasing would offend his manhood and send him running for the hills!

And think about it, the chances of RA and I ever having a relationship are less than my chances of winning the national lottery but, if I ever were lucky to meet him and he was in fact gay, well we might (just might) become friends.

And no, my enormous crush wouldn't be a problem. I've had a crush on so many gay men over the years! They just seem to get women in a way that most men don't (probably 'cos they're in the same boat as us in having to deal with dating men). But with a gay man (despite the films trying to tell you otherwise on occasion) you know that's all it will ever be, a crush.

Judith Johnson said...

I read a post that some put up that said it was an "open secret" on the set of Spooks about RA's sexual orientation towards men. After that all the oddness about his lifestyle choices, secretiveness, and lack of history of any kind of relationships suddenly made sense. Don't get me wrong, i still fantasize over G of G and will l always love N & S but RA's a very odd duck now on the wrong side of fourty. I prefer actors who are more comfortable in their own skins and I don't think he ever can be because being gay is a deal killer for macho men and romantic actors.

Patricia Kinch said...

Finding out that RA is gay has made me throw out all of his DVDS that I had of him, including North and South, that was a sad day for me and
my friends who had admired him. He is a good actor, in the wrong way.
He should be honest about his being a homosexual! Very Sad Day Now!

Traxy said...

Way to over-react there, especially since there is no evidence of his sexual preferences, only a lot of speculation. So because of the mere possibility of him not being a heterosexual male has made you no longer enjoy the productions he's in? Seriously?

mommbsta said...

very true: the main reason for our attraction to him IS his talent and seemingly warm personality - romantic fantasies are just that - FANTASIES so even if he was an elephant; i'd still be wanting to share memories with him

mommbsta said...

ideal male in all of his characters??? i enjoyed watching all that i've seen of his roles (because of his charasmatic talent) but i don't believe all of his characters portrayed an ideal male.

mommbsta said...

unless you're only talking about ' looks'

mommbsta said...

hear hear!

mommbsta said...

hmmm? on the aspect of being gay: i don't think that analogy is fair. being gay is NOT a flaw in character (maybe i misunderstood?)

Cat Winchester said...

She's either a troll or a bigot. Either way, she's best left alone with her poisonous opinions.

Traxy said...

Thank you for your wonderful, heartfelt comment, Cat. I can see where you're coming from, even though for me, it was different. Growing up, I always had an easier time talking to boys than to girls. Maybe because the guys in general didn't really care, but with girls, I could never truly feel relaxed, because there was always that feeling of being measured and compared.

Anyway, I completely agree that if he is, I hope he's the one that comes out, and that no one does it for him. Like you say, that's cruel. It's his story to tell, not anyone else's.

Lynn Bryant said...

I'm sorry, did I miss something? None of us know if Richard is gay or straight. And he is not obligated to reveal this part of his life to us just because we are fans.

I met him in person once and since his sexual preferences were not revealed to me and I have no gaydar unless it is patently obvious I have no idea. I did however find him absolutely gorgeous, very warm and friendly.

So I will continue to buy his DVDs, go to his movies, watch him on the TV and fantasize about him (BTW I think I would still fantasize about him even if I knew he was gay). If others can't handle it, well that's their loss.

Traxy said...

Well said! Also: lucky you! :D

Mariayets said...

He's so cute tht it doesn't matter...

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