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#FanstRA: All I can say is that I love to love you

Today’s Tag Teams: In the Hobbit chain, Mrs. E.B. Darcy projects what our hero may do in TH: There and Back Again • Ana Cris discusses a Maori ceremony Mr. Armitage witnessed in New Zealand’s mountains • In King Richard Armitage, fitzg guestposts at judiang’s on non-Richard roles for Armitage in a Richard III project • In fanfic, Jas Rangoon continues  her modern N&S fic • Maria Grazia presents an interview with Cat Winchester and giveaway of her book, Northern Light • In freeform, fedoralady asks about our dream Armitage-narrated audiobooks • John Thornton wonders if anyone else could play him • Agzy discusses Heinz Kruger’s sartorial choices — and what’s underneath them! • In fandom, jazzbaby1 maps Armitage in the Tommyverse • Links to all FanstRA 3 posts appear here at the end of each day.

This post is inspired, but not exactly based on, Richard Armitage’s character in Between the Sheets.

Say what you want about Paul, that doesn’t really matter, because all we really care about are those peaches he has on such a marvellous display. Yes, even if we won’t admit it, we do like to admire his body in all its glory. (Even though I’m personally quite happy not to see the crown jewels. That would feel wayyyyy to awkward!) But then there’s the point of Paul potentially being unfaithful to his spouse, and that brings up a few interesting thoughts for those of us who are in steady relationships – and/or are married … Because as much as we love Richard Armitage, where does that leave our significant others? Time to come clean …

If Richard Armitage came knocking on my door wearing a cravat, offering me a single, red rose and a box of Thornton’s chocolates, and say he’d take me away here and now … well, aside from feeling deeply underdressed for such a momentous occasion (judging by my not-so-flattering appearance writing this), and wondering if my breath smells, and of course being so shocked I wouldn’t know what to say … I’d probably invite him in for a hot drink – because after all, what an opportunity to get to know in real life and have an actual conversation with him! – but would I put my shoes on, grab my keys and go?

No. No, I wouldn’t, and that’s something I’ve wanted to make absolutely clear for a very long time now.

I know I probably come across as a lusty fangirl at times, and while I can’t exactly deny the fangirl part, I will definitely dispute the “lusty” part. Just because I admire someone’s physical appearance doesn’t actually make me want to have sex with them. It would probably make me a lot happier if that was the case, but it isn’t.

I don’t want to get into personal specifics here, because this is a public place for everyone in the world to see, but in short, I’m terribly romantic person who appreciates beauty and other fine things in life (astrology fans out there: Taurus is my Moon sign). That’s why I’m a foodie, for instance. It’s also the reason why I greatly admire actors I find attractive … but it’s a sort of abstract pursuit.

Looking at a photo of Richard Armitage, I’ll look at it, at him, and appreciate his face and his body. I like the little lines around his eyes, the curve of his lips, the shape of his nose, the lines his body makes with clothing, and find it all very, very beautiful. More so because the man inside is even more beautiful than the outside. I’ll look at his peaches, finding them a great specimen of a pair of buttocks (there, I said it!) and find it all very visually appealing, and might wonder how they feel to touch … but I’m not picturing myself there, and I certainly don’t get aroused by seeing his bare backside.

Same goes for any actor I’ll be completely gobsmacked when watching and more often than not, gush over in a blog post. It’s kind of like having a particularly beautiful painting on the wall. I enjoy looking at it, admiring it for its beauty, loving every bit of it because it’s so gorgeous to behold … but that’s it. I would never imagine any of them while having sex, for instance. That’s not how I work at all, and if anything, I’d feel a little bit as if I was cheating, and that would be such a turn-off.

No, if anything, I’m a romance junkie, and that painting I mentioned? I’d be more inclined to want to cuddle up in its arms and having it reciting choice passages from Jane Eyre to me. Like the first 41 seconds of this clip. Sorry, it doesn’t have Richard Armitage in it and the film it’s from turned out to suck, but oh, Ken Olin à la 1997, reciting poetry in bed … wow. See? That’s what I’m talking about. That part is my idea of a fantasy, not the bit that obviously happened to make them both end up in bed together. I’m in love with ideas more than anything, I think.

But the one person who I love, not as an idea, but with with all my heart, body and soul, is the man I married, who gets referred to here only as “The Squeeze” and only when occasion calls for it? Should he be jealous that I find Richard Armitage (and Ken Olin, and others *cough*) attractive? That I collect DVD:s of shoddy films and TV-series just because they were in it? Depends on how you look at it, I suppose, but I think of them more as pretty paintings. I like to rest my eyes on them once in a while, but that’s all. The Squeeze is the one I snuggle up to at night, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Also, in all honesty, there is also something we could call “spun/exaggerated for entertainment purposes”, which I’m pretty sure we all do at one point or another. As in, we don’t literally swoon when we see JT kiss Margaret, do we? Nor do we actually drool when we see Lucas North getting out of a boiler suit. No, we just use exaggerated expressions to illustrate an emotional point. So if I’m gushing about how fantastically wonderful Richard Armitage (or anyone else) is, yes, I really do think he’s fantastically wonderful … but perhaps not to quite the same degree as it would seem.

Actually, bad example. Take any “fancying the pants off” (and similar) comments instead, that would be more appropriate: I have no wish whatsoever to get personally acquainted with what the man’s pants is hiding, no matter how gorgeous he is from the waist up. Truth be known, I’d rather have them with their clothes on, giving me a cuddle. Kissing. (I love kissing.) The rest is better left to imagination. Someone else’s, that is; not mine …

I love to love, and that’s my drug of choice. It’s comparatively cheap, money-wise, but can get a little emotionally exhausting at times. And I love the idea of loving Richard Armitage. But it’s nothing but a mirage. I have already found my real-life Perfect Man (who of course isn’t perfect at all, because no one ever is, and we love them despite their flaws), and if I was to describe a painting of what he would look like, I would give the description of someone tall, dark and handsome. (Preferably Irish.) That would be my image of the Perfect Man … but what I would see when I close my eyes and told to picture who my heart belongs to … unless he had walked me down the isle, it wouldn’t be Richard Armitage, put it that way … It would be my very own King of Hearts:

Not Henry VIII, obviously! The Squeeze.
There just happens to be an uncanny
resemblance, especially in this picture.
(The Squeeze is the better looking one,
but this is as close as you’re gonna get.)

Ahh, I think I feel better now. Sorry for the post being really long. Just had a lot on my chest today.

Was it as good for you as it was for me? ;]

Traxy Thornfield

A Swedish introvert residing in Robin Hood Country (Nottingham, UK) with a husband and two cats. She's an eager participant in tabletop and play-by-post roleplaying, woodworking, photography and European travel, when there's not a plague on. Might get a novel out one of these days, if she doesn't get too distracted along the way.

16 thoughts on “#FanstRA: All I can say is that I love to love you

  1. As a single woman, desperate to find a man like Richard, I’m your complete opposite. Next time I hear he’s in Los Angeles, I’m not taking out the trash without putting on make-up and spanx first. Just in case. 😉 hahaha

  2. LOL, Mrs. Darcy!! Now THAT is funny.

    I love that you love your husband, Traxy! Areb;t we blessed to have such wonderful men in our lives?! Great piece!!

    1. Well, if I didn’t, that would be a rather sad state of affairs … 😉 And I agree, those of us who have that are truly blessed, and those who haven’t, I wish them all the best of luck! Everyone deserves to have someone who loves them and that they love in return.

  3. Sorry, it;s me, The Queen/NovemberBride..also meemawof10 but am about to change that to meemawof11. Confused? Me too.

  4. “I love to love, and that’s my drug of choice” – great saying!
    Very interesting post. Mmmmm I guess I think of Mr BB as the “beneficiary” of my love for RA. And smart man as he is, Mr BB perfectly understands ;). Yep – I lust after RA. Full on thudding lust – in my imagination! And there is so much wonderful material to feed it – DVDs, audio books, fan vids, fan fiction, interviews, blogs, screencaps. Sigh………what a divine hobby RA is 🙂

  5. I’ll be a pain and say I have never understood why the need to make the disclaimers. Not that you shouldn’t make them — but of course people love their husbands. Is it not possible to truly love one’s spouse and yet fangirl as well? I’m single, so maybe I don’t get it, but when I was in a relationship I frequently listened to remarks my SO made about a particular actress and we went to see all her stuff. I didn’t feel threatened in the least. She wasn’t in bed with him, I was. 🙂

    1. Very true. Not like he didn’t enter into this relationship without knowing my penchant for Sam Neill. 😉

      I think, for me, this post was more about going on the record (you never know who might come across this blog), and also not wanting to give the wrong impression – or correct any wrong impressions already made. It might not matter on the whole, or to anyone else, but it matters to me, strange as that might seem. 🙂

  6. Traxy such a fantastic article that can totally relate too and I didn’t think it was defensive at all. While I love my “Squeeze” totally and he gets why I “lust and languish” over Richard and has realised it is not just a passing fancy, at the end of the day I just love being part of the Richard fandom and all it entails.

    Making great new friends that I love meeting in person or hoping I could meet in person one day, letting my imagination get away sometimes with thoughts of Richard, all the creativity of others that stimulate the senses including the womanly ones called to part of me when I was feeling lonely and isolated physically as well as emotionally. So I really love my real life reality that includes a healthy dose of Richard imagination and interaction.

  7. we all have our own individual way/degree of fantasizing i guess. kudos to all who proudly wear their hearts on their sleeve – that was one of the reason that attracted me to these blogs. being here is proof that we all have the same attraction to RA. Traxy was trying to explain (i think) the relationship between her love for RA vs her love for the SQUEEZE. (basically what lucylou said) – no disclaimers here only enthusiasm and alot of good company.
    and that drug? we are all guilty of being addicts…

    1. Sort of like this:

      “My love for Linton is like the foliage in the woods. Time will change it, I’m well aware, as winter changes the trees — my love for Heathcliff resembles the eternal rocks beneath — a source of little visible delight, but necessary. Nelly, I am Heathcliff — he’s always, always in my mind — not as a pleasure, any more than I am always a pleasure to myself — but as my own being”

      …Sort of. Except, uh, I haven’t married RA while lusting after the Squeeze, and the Squeeze isn’t a crazy-ass killer hell bent on revenge. But y’know. As quotes to illustrate a point go, it kinda works.

  8. A very interesting post, allowing everyone to reflect on their own situation. Of course you’re a bit defensive, even if it’s involuntary, because whatever you say, being a fan of an actor past adolescence, especially when you’re in a relationship always seems a little weird for your circle. One might think that you’re looking for something that’s missing in your couple. What is wrong because, on the contrary, that passion brings something extra to your relationship.

    Personally, I sometimes make parallels between le BF and Richard, and I realize that what I love about RA is precisely what he has in common with my boyfriend. I don’t need RA, I’ve already my own Thorin ;).

    1. That’s exactly it. Spot on, on everything. Except for Thorin … I think he’s more Harry Kennedy. 🙂

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